(A 2020 poem)
The ban on hugs begins to bug me.
“Please reconsider all the hugs.
Don’t be a mug and stop all hugging!
Hugs are highly contagious,
Hugging is under review.”
Hugs aren’t exactly OK
In postcodes beginning with A.
Refrain from hugging, they reiterate,
In Tier 2, 3, 6 and 8.
“I’m not being witty, or funny, or Sage when I say:
People over certain age need not excess affection!
A wave would suffice.
Hugging these days isn’t advised,
For I swear, it disturbs far too many particles of air;
minute microbes are lurking in innocent disguise,
they may as well spell it: our demise.”
“Sir, the guidelines have us confounded, perplexed,
is there any way they can change a little less
often?
The amount of stress they cause
is positively beyond what I can express.
In addition, I would like to say,
Hugging is immunity-improving,
It boosts the body’s natural defence,
And it ain’t a criminal offence.”
“The daily figures couldn’t be clearer.
Getting too near to others is not a good idea.
Hugging is dangerous! Beware! It’s a fact.
Stay 2 meters away to keep your health intact.
Otherwise, it may be too late,
You may need to self-isolate.
The latest expert scientific advice is that,
Unless cases decrease,
all hugging is to immediately cease!
‘Cause Hands-face-space and Track and trace are not enough,
We should embrace… no hugging!
No hugging we should embrace!”
N.B. The rules of hugging will be reviewed on a fortnightly basis with effect from Saturday at 4 a.m.
Purple Travel Path 